A Ninety-Year-Old Teetotaler

Several members of a temperance league approached a ninety-year-old teetotaler for a testimonial declaring that his longevity was due to a life of abstention from alcohol.

The old gentleman said he would be pleased to sign such a statement and was in the process of making his mark when sounds of a riotous party came from an adjacent room. "My God, what's that?" gasped one of the visitors.

"Oh, that's just my dad," the teetotaler laughed. "He's probably getting drunk again."