Aviation Jokes

Speaking of nervousness, an old lady was making her first flight in an airplane. She was highly nervous and insiste
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There may be fifty ways to leave your lover, but there are only four ways to leave this airplane.
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As the aircraft was taxiing towards the runway to take off, the voice on the speaker welcomed passengers on board a
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A fiberglass port-a-potty at Oshkosh with the message "I could have been a Glassair!" written on it?
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At a recent software engineering management course in the US, the participants were given an awkward question to an
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Occasionally, airline attendants make an effort to make the "in-flight safety lecture" and their other anouncements
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A photographer for a national magazine was assigned to take pictures of a great forest fire. He was advised that a
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After booking my 80-year-old grandmother on a flight from Florida to Nevada, I called the airline to go over her sp
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I just got off the phone with a man who asked "How do I know which plane to get on?" I asked him what exactly he me
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On the way back to New York as I was sitting in the Phoenix airport, they announced that the flight to Vegas was fu
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An airliner was having engine trouble and the pilot instructed the cabin crew to
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They don't sell tickets, they sell chances. All the insurance machines in the terminal are sold out.
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I had someone ask for an aisle seat on the plane so that their hair wouldn't get messed up by being near the window
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A friend of mine was learning how to fly (a plane, obviously) and asked his instructor the safety benefits of a twi
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You are one of TWO persons on a malfunctioning aeroplane with only one parachute.
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A man jumps out of an airplane with a parachute on his back. As he's falling, he realizes hiss chute is broken.
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I had an offer from a large company and they offered to fly me out to the meeting on business class.
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Two air traffic controllers collided in the tower at New York's La Guardia airport.
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"I think the pilot on my last trip was pretty new to his job.
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Ole is so cheap that after his airplane landed safely, he grumbled: "Vell, dere gose five dollars down da drain for
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